Some of you may say something like, “Lynn knows all the ‘whys’ now.” I appreciate those sentiments, and all the love and caring that they represent. I would love to think Lynn wove her threads into Heaven’s blanket. If you were one of Lynn’s online friends, then you know more about Lynn than you do about me, and so you know Lynn believed that. Lynn knew that I didn’t. She called me an atheist, but she knew I understood and respected the importance of beliefs and rituals, and that I saw the truths in the messages in religious texts. I just want to be honest. I would love to believe Lynn is flying around the universe with full knowledge of all things. All I can say is that for me, her eternal life depends on how I keep her in my thoughts, in my heart, in my soul. The light of all souls remains eternal within our own inner light. If I tell you about those lights, Lynn and the people in my life live on when I’m gone. We are many threads.
Watching Lynn in Hollywood filming Jeopardy! has been hard to describe. For Lynn, it was the most fun she ever had and, at the same time, not a big deal. “It’s just a game show,” she’d say. But I know she felt validated by the experience. It let her know she’d survived her past, that none of it was her fault. She could point to herself on Jeopardy! and say, “THIS is who I am.” It was proof in her own mind, not validation she ever sought from others.
For me, it was more than a once-in-a-lifetime experience, for it was an experience I couldn’t have had in a hundred lifetimes but for Lynn. It was exhilarating, at times almost dream-like. For both of us, it was the most joyous, exciting period in our lives.
But there are always things unseen. Most of the Jeopardy! money went into the savings; a trip to England was excitedly planned. Who could have foreseen the trip delayed for years and the money used instead for a down payment on the house in which Lynn would die?
This is the final Jeopardy! clue in the category “Metaphors:”
"This phrase may be a metaphor for Jeopardy! and is what lies ahead for us all.”